#atozchallenge B is for a Beautiful me

This time last year I would look in the mirror and I did not like the person that I saw. I was so beaten down, mentally and physically from mental health, chronic health issues and my marriage that I started to feel like a prisoner; in my body, in my home and in life.  I knew I needed to make changes, and trust me, I tried for years. I just didn’t see a way out of what I was going through. I can’t tell you how many times I would go to bed at night, in so much pain, just not caring whether or not I woke up the next morning.

That, my friends, is no way for anyone to live.

After years of this back and forth stay-or-go battle and we finally decided it was best to part ways, I’ll admit, I had a pity party for about a week. And then, I realized, I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT now (and I am!! So many things to tell you guys, soon!!!!

Getting through the holidays without kiddo and some of my in-laws was hard. But I knew I had to start worrying less about that situation and worrying about me. It was time for me to take care of me and the minute I realized a beautiful person still existed inside of me and I just had to bring her back to the surface, I took off running and haven’t looked back.

Almost, literally.

At first, I was just trying to manage what I ate and do some walking when I could. I think having the right medications finally to manage my chronic pain issues and deal with my mental health was a huge improvement. Getting away from the negativity was another. Now, I am focused on better nutrition and I’m working out almost every day. It has gotten to the point where I have done the “21 days to make a habit” and I crave it, want it and am truly loving how I feel when I work out. The weight is coming down slowly due to the PCOS but I feel so much stronger with each workout.

I’m on a new journey in life, a new chapter. And this one is all about beautiful me. I have a long road in front of me, but this time, I am not quitting.