It is no big secret why I asked to be on this blog tour. I was abused as a young child and it was something I struggled with in my last marriage and now it is something I struggle with in my current marriage. No matter how much therapy I arm myself with , it can never be enough to try to get the man in my life to understand. No matter how hard they try – they can’t fix me.
I wanted my husband to read this book and he did. He is not much of a reader so it was a big deal for me to get him to. I read it myself before handing it off to him. I knew it was something he would benefit from reading. I knew that if he saw it from a different perspective instead of it always coming from me that maybe something would click inside and he would be able to understand things a little differently.
This is what he had to say:
Dawn Scott’s book called “When a Woman You Love Has Been Abused”, was a great look into the lives of women that have been abused, and they way they live their everyday lives. My wife was abused as a child, and she reacts almost exactly to how some of the women in this book did. The anger, not wanting to be touched, and the way that everyday objects could trigger reactions from them was a keen insight into what they have gone, and are going through daily. I have a greater understanding of what my wife is going through because of this book.
All I can say is that I think every man who has a woman in his life that has been abused should read this book. I wish my psychiatrist had a copy of this 10 years ago when I was trying to help my ex-husband understand why I act the way that I do. I can only hope my husband now can take something from the book and apply it to life now.
About the Book:
The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services reports that 80 percent of childhood abuse victims later suffer from at least one abuse-induced psychological disorder. It’s proven that the effects of childhood abuse follow women into adulthood. Yet few men are prepared to deal with those effects, even when their own wife is the one who is suffering. And their wife’s suffering becomes their own suffering as their needs aren’t being met by a wife who is powerless to control her inner turmoil.
Author, pastor, and survivor Dawn Scott Jones candidly shares her own abuse experience to help husbands understand the varied emotions, fears, distorted thoughts, and triggers that hold their wives captive. In practical and accessible language, Jones explains the stages of the healing journey (processing denial, asking for help, grieving, expressing anger, learning to forgive, and finding resolution). Building on that knowledge, Jones then moves to an honest discussion of what husbands can do to help. Whether it’s creating a healing environment, understanding the need for control, building trust, or even just praying for healing, a husband plays an active role in helping his wife survive and thrive despite her past abuse.
Offering hope for a healthy marriage relationship, When a Woman You Love Was Abused answers the questions men have and offers the advice they need to help their wives finally find peace.
For over twenty years God has graciously used Dawn to touch the lives of people through her affecting personal testimony, her humor, and her writing. Dawn’s past challenges have deepened and enriched her ministry; enabling her to truly understand and relate to what others are going through.
Dawn is an Ordained Minister with the Assemblies of God. She has served in various capacities including Executive Team Pastor, Small Groups Pastor, and Woman’s Ministry Director. Dawn travels Nation-wide speaking, training and consulting.